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June 2012
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August 2012

Dieting with Cobbler

Here's the story... last winter I ate a lot of carbs.  I also sat around, a lot.  And, as often happens in these cases, I gained weight.  Not a ton of weight, not enough to be very noticeable, but enough weight that my clothes were not fitting!  This was clearly unacceptable. Not so much because of the few extra pounds (before you start wagging your finger at me, sighing heavily, and saying, "This can only be expected.  You're getting older you know"), but because I didn't want to go out and buy new clothes

So with Spring I started counting my calories and working out. I felt out of shape and lethargic so I knew it was time to get up off my butt.  Plus, I figured it was way cheaper to get healthy than to go buy the next size up.  Actually, I got all pissy and stubborn about it.  "Oh, I'm beating this bitch! I am NOT buying new clothes!"  You know, except for the sports bras, and some new shoes "for training", and some sweats, and, um, a cute top or - ahem - two. 

Anyway.  In two and a half months' time... working through those beginning workouts until I didn't feel like I was dying, reducing calories until my stomach shrunk enough so I didn't feel like I was starving, cutting out my precious cookies and baked goods until I didn't crave them anymore... guess how much weight I lost?!

Not one fucking pound!

Not one!  In two and half months!  However, I was starting to look pretty toned, and my stamina and energy were up. I figured I must be replacing some fat weight with muscle weight. Right?  (Right?! Just lie to me, damnit.)  So I decided if the weight wasn't going to move I would just get really toned and look fabulous as I kicked and screamed gracefully into middle age. (Because I'm still pretending that I haven't already been middle-aged for quite some time.)  I continued watching my calories, I bought an exercise book, and proceeded to target my (big surprise) abs for this transformation. 

And it threw my back out. Every stupid stomach exercise also targets your core, but my back is already really strong so it gets all jacked up if I work it wrong.  I know that sounds like total bullshit but it's this thing where I have dense muscles in certain places (i.e. big butt) that then wrench other muscles and my vertebrae out of alignment and then those same damn muscles lock in around the jacked up place so it can't relax.  It sucks.  And several masseuses/therapists told me that's what's happening so really, it's not wishful thinking about my superhero strong back. 

Anyway, at this point I'm about three months into my "diet" (the quotes are because it only counts as a diet if you actually lose weight) and I pretty much gave up.  I still work out on my elliptical or do calisthenics (which don't hurt my back or joints) and I still count calories.  It being summer, I'm hip deep in fruit and jamming like a crazy woman.  I loosened up on my eating and I started making goodies again with the extra fruit.  For example, some nights I would just have a big old piece of cobbler for dinner. I mean, BIG.  The next day I would have toast with jam for two meals in a row.  Then we'd go out for dinner and I'd order pie for dessert.  (Note: not as good as mine.)  I also found an awesome cheese that just went so nicely with fresh plums!

And guess the fuck what?  Now, after I already broke down and bought shorts that fit, in the last week and half I've lost fucking weight! 

On cobbler!  That is just crazy.                     - wg

Texting for kids

I don't know about the rest of the parents out there but Chance has been asking for his own cell phone since before he actually knew our home number. I pointed out that that could be an impediment with his own phone but he wasn't convinced. Technology is everywhere and the kids think it's just as cool as the rest of us do. Even when they don't know how to do it yet.

So I got this really cool invitation from Hallmark to go to a backstage event last week with Demi Lovato.  Hallmark partnered with her to present their newest little gadget - this one aimed at kids who want to be just as hip as the big guys. Available beginning yesterday, Text Bands lets kids send text messages to each other just like they want, without killing your pocketbook or opening up your kids to the potentially hazardous online world too early. Hallmark Hero-Watches hi-res cropped

Text Bands are these neat little watch-like bracelets that kids can program with up to 24 different text messages at a time. You need two of them work because they speak to each other. Then when a kid sees a friend or sibling with another Text Band they can trade their message with a fist bump or by shaking hands (basically, close proximity causes the band to band transfer).  Bad word filters are also in place so your children can't call each other "poophead" or worse all day long (which Chance and his best buddy tried immediately btw). It makes the kids feel like grownups, lets them express themselves, and keeps them safe while doing it. And besides entertaining them for hours, it puts the whining for a phone on reprieve. Double bonus!

And here, drumroll please, is Demi playing to a room full of kids and their parents. It was very sweet actually. Most of the girls were rapt with attention!  (The boys, as usual, were little wigglers.)

Demi Lovato 005

Impasses and other fish

I've hit a wall with Chance about his occuptaional therapy.  We've been doing rhythmic movement therapy (Primitive Reflex Integration) since last October.  (Wow, I didn't realize it had been so long.)  But just in the last couple of months, my son is giving me total attitude about it.  There is a lot of whining and fighting it and not doing it correctly, trying to push my buttons while doing it, etc.  So I decided to let him have a break for a couple of weeks.  It is summer after all and I think he's just fighting anything that is beyond relaxation.  Poor overworked child.  *utter sarcasm*

I wasn't convinced yet that this new therapy was doing much.  It was giving him some more coordination, but it's also supposed to give a kid more impulse control and I wasn't seeing that yet.  But by the end of the two week break... he was losing control of his body!  I mean, a lot more unconscious flailing of his arms; throwing his body around without realizing it, stuff like that.  I was like, Wow! OK, I guess this IS helping.  It's subtle, but for long-term control I think it's good for him.

So we started up again. And he went right back to giving me crap about it.  I keep trying to make it fun but it's hard to keep it fun when you're getting mad.  I'm frustrated.  On top of that every time I try to give this one goldfish medicine another goldfish dies.  Non sequitur, I know, except I kind of feel like the goldfish are a giant fucking metaphor! 

I think I'm also running out of creative ideas TO make it fun.  I mean, I've been basically doing one form of therapy or other with him, almost every day, since he was 3 1/2.  I know therapy works; he's just being a total twirp.

This week I started incorporating music with our rhythmic movement.  Hopefully music will tame the savage beast and blah blah blah.  I wonder if I should bribe him?  I haven't tried that yet.  (I try to save the bribery for special events, you understand but maybe we're at that point.) 

But...  if anyone has any other ideas I'd love to hear them.     

                     - the weirdgirl