The old people are freaking me out again

Sunny Bright Rainbow Happy Land Preschool

Preschool Director: "Well, that concludes the tour! Do you have any other questions about our lovely preschool?"

Mom:  "Yes, can you tell me a little about your educational philosophy?

"Director: "Certainly!  Here at Cheerful Name Preschool we believe all children have the potential for a bright future!  Our founder - bless her soul, she passed just a year ago - opened this school based on key tenets to build a bridge to success.  Therefore, we uniquely provide a nuturing and supportive environment for our children, carrying on her vision!"

Mom: "Oh, what are the key tenets?

Director:  "Excuse me?"

Mom: "You said your philoshophy was built on key tenets?"

Director:  "Er...yes, it's built on key tenets!" 

Mom: "O-Kay... well, what makes your school different?"

Director:  "Oh!  Well, here at Cheerful Name we strongly believe that a cheerful name provides a cornerstone of positivity that is crucial to a child's development.  For example, my name is Sunny and I've found I can get through many of life's rough patches by just taking a deep breath and saying my name..." (takes deep breath),  "Sunny!  A cheerful name just makes you feel good and we like to surround our children with that cheer.  What's your daughter's name?"

Mom, quite proudly: "This is little Morticia. Say 'hi' Morticia!"

Morticia, "Hi, lady!"

Director:  "OH! Oh, well... hmm, Morty... Tish... Ticia. Ticia is cute! We could work with that."

Mom: "Umm, what?"

Director:  "Well, Morticia is a little... not dark, but cloudy, don't you think?  And we do want to keep up that positive energy so they can reach all of their potential." 

Mom:  "My chief requirement is that you have a good kindergarten-readiness program.  I don't see how changing my daughter's name is going to help her learn."

Director:  "But it does! It does, you just have to give it a try! Our founder wouldn't have steered us wrong!"

Mom:  "Your founder specifically said this school was based on cheerful names as an educational platform?"

Director:  "Well, no, not specifically - you have to understand her passing was a little sudden - but that's where all the marketing literature was leaning... the importance of having a cheerful name."

Mom:  "OK, well thank you for your time!"

Director:  "Great meeting you! You can pick up an application at the front desk!"

Mom walks out past the front desk where the receptionist tries to hand her an application.

Mom: "No thank you." Sunny day

Receptionist: "For what it's worth the teachers here are quite good." 

Mom: "Really? And what's your name?"

Receptionist, sighing: "Diablo, but she makes me go by Dee-Dee."


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