Summer, it turns me upside down
And the parenting award goes to...

Do if you're damned, damned if you don't

This was an interesting article I ran across today.  My reactions were mixed and immediate. Simultaneously I thought, "Ha! I knew it!" and "Crap, am I doing that?"  (But I pretty much feel twinges of guilt whenever I read ANY article on parenting.)  I don't think this is terribly new news.  We all know competi-parents out there; parents who can't stand to see their kids fail or want them to always feel confident, successful, and secure.  At Chance's science fair there were entries that were obviously made by parents.  (Which was a trap I was terrified I'd do myself. I mean, how much "help" is too much?)  And while I was happy for Chance that he won first place, part of me thought, "Shit! Now he's going to expect to win every year!"

There's nothing wrong with wanting the best for your kids but there should be balance.  A little suffering builds character.  Wow, that sounds wrong.  How about, a little failure never hurt anyone?  Of course, I was irked to see that that article did not give any helpful hints about which nurturing NOT to do.  Ugh, that sounds wrong, too.  My head and my ovaries are totally bitch slapping each other right now.  I don't think I'm giving my child "too much" but at the same time he's got a lot more than I had when I was a kid.  You know the irony is that I often feel guilty AND like I'm doing a good job at the same time! Or at least a the-best-I-can-sometimes-failing-but-mostly-OK-I-think job.

Let's face it, we're all screwed up.  I blame psychology.  (Freud, you bastard, you landed me in therapy.)

Question: since so many of us waited later in life to have kids I wonder if we're projecting our mid-life crises on them? Does that mean if I over-parent Chance into being super successful he'll buy me a convertible?!

Score.     

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