I present to you... SOCKTOPUSSY!!
... stuffed with panties!
Because really, two things that end up in landfills are socks and undies. And you know, some of those things were good to me, they were comfy and we had a deep and committed relationship, and I don't think I should throw it all away because a little hole appears in the heel or maybe fabric runs up my butt. So I took some of my favorite pairs of socks (and panties) and turned them into a cuddly toy.
Somehow, making an octopus seemed less intimidating than a monkey.
Before you get all EEWWW! and GERMS! just know that everything is washed and washable. Geez. In the old days people would have saved up all their fabric scraps to stuff into pillows and mattresses, and then you would have been sleeping on someone's panties! Think about that.
Besides this socktopus is for our home, made out of our home's goods.
However, I bet if someone started selling socktopussies stuffed with panties there'd be a niche market for that somewhere. - wg