Firstly, we will learn grammar

What is this thing you call freedom?

I really should get off my ass because now that Chance is in school and they've extended the school day I've got SIX HOURS to myself!  There are fancy stores to visit, and cities, and activities I could do where it would be inappropriate to bring a child along. And before your heads drop too far into the gutter I'm talking poetry readings where I could listen without feeding my child video game cartridges and unendingly nudging him to hush.  I'm talking artsy stores where every single item (including the salespeople) are made up of glass, and not just regular glass made from desert sand, I mean fancy glass from Italy made from tiny ground-up glass elves. I'm talking exotic locales (i.e. local places of interest) where I could be eating something fruit inspired that is not remotely as healthy as eating actual fruit without sharing.  That's what I'm talking about.

And you know what I've done for the last three days while Chance is off scampering on the playground? I've fricking slept.  I've slept through my precious freedom hours and it is all Lady Gaga's fault.  I went to her concert Tuesday night (review at Culture Brats!) and somewhere between the crotch gyrating, heart eating, and the giant angler monster I got a cold!  A fucking cold!  While it's still warm out!  I just know those flaming boobs were spewing germs into the audience.  And the whole concert here she was inciting us to "set ourselves free".

Really, Ms. Gaga?  Because I can't be pretend fabulous with a cold.

Or, as one fellow parent, said to me yesterday, "What, you expect a life?!"

Fuck yeah. Lady Gaga said so.

Bitch.                  - wg