OK, I got a little beef to pick. (Wait, is that beef or bone? Probably bone, right? Who picks on cows?) I’ve written in the past about my issues with undergarments. Well since then (it’s been almost a year) I managed to find a couple new brands of undies. Yay! One style in particular that I absolutely love!
They are heavenly. No ride up factor, fits perfectly. Beautiful, soft material. Like cloth spun from ripped-off angel wings on my butt. They have become the new favorites in my knicker rotation.
However, this style also happens to look a little granny-like. Not exactly billowing-in-the-breeze briefs but definitely NOT Brazilian cut bikinis or sexy thongs. (I still hate thongs.) When I first found them I distinctly remember thinking, “Hmmm, I’m not sure Keen is going to like these,” but they were So… Damn... Comfy! And given the usual torture that is underwear shopping I knew, granny panties or not, these were keepers.
(Because, let’s face it, if anything is going to trump sexy it’s usually comfort. Sorry guys (as you sit on the couch in your boxers with a stained tee halfway up your stomach).)
So imagine my surprise when the following exchange occurred…
Keen, watching me change one day, “Your ass looks SO HOT in those!”
Ding ding ding! “Really?” Me, craning around to look at my undies, “I thought they looked like granny panties. I mean, they cover up a lot.”
“Whatever. They’re still hot, baby.”
(Welcome to what passes as foreplay in my house.)
I was ecstatic! Underwear that was incredibly comfortable and didn’t make me look geriatric! Or did in a really sexy way. Or… wait, that’s just wrong. Anyway, these suckers rocked!!
So of course, I go to order more… even at the whopping $7 dollars a pop (yeah, I know that’s a good price for underwear but I only pay $6 for my t-shirts and those have WAY more material!) and…
…they’ve been discontinued.
My sexy granny panties. Gone. Because why would anyone keep making something that was so damn comfortable?!
(No one should feel this much heartbreak so close to Valentine’s Day.)