Nine Months Old
The Great Santa Mystery

It’s Beginning to Cramp A Lot Like Christmas

I have been rushing all weekend to get Christmas stuff done.  See, I have this whole system when I’m overloaded of assigning myself deadlines (or sometimes rolling deadlines) in order to complete everything.  All scheduled in between caring for the child, of course.  Last week was “complete all Christmas shopping” and “finish so-and-so project for work”.  This weekend was “wrap gifts,” “decorate tree,” “get photos done,”  and “start Christmas cards”.  This coming week, starting tomorrow, is “start 2nd & 3rd projects for work,” “make fudge,” “finish Christmas loose ends,” and “craft projects”.  You get the picture.  Ambitious little twat, aren’t I?   

This is how the weekend actually went:

Saturday

Clean house

Start wrapping gifts

wrap

wrap

wrap

Anticipate getting photos with Chance and Santa

Get excited

Think about the mall on the weekend

dither

Move getting photos done to Monday night

wrap

wrap

Order project items online

Think about Christmas cards; shuffle stack of post-it notes shoved inside address book

wrap

wrap – still not finished

House is now a mess again

Sunday

Get period

cramp

cramp

cramp

Drag ass out of bed

cramp

Attempt to clean up portions of house

Take pain medication

cramp

Move furniture in anticipation of tree

cramp

Take more pain medication

cramp

Go to neighbors party

Drink wine

feel better (a little)

Decorate tree

Yell at cat for attacking tree

Fix tree

Sit in numbed state on couch

cramp

Roll remaining items on list forward

The problem with my system is that it doesn’t allow for breakdowns in momentum of any kind.  Or sometimes sleep.  However, I stick with my method because I do pad the deadline schedule liberally.  So in theory that means IF I get everything done I will have the week before Christmas free to sit on my ass, play with Chance, and read books.  Maybe even go visit people.  You know, for the holidays.  It’s that whole “work hard up front, screw off later” system.  Maybe I can still manage to catch up.  I really like the screwing off part.             – the weirdgirl

P.S. I thought cramps were supposed to go away after having a baby?  Or at least get better.  What the fuck?!

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