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October 2011
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December 2011

Dear Christmas, please hold my attention more efffectively

This is going to sound strange but I've been having total free floating anxiety without a cause. Like James Dean but if Woody Allen had been directing.  And it's all about the holidays. I've been very careful not to overload myself, and I'm not overloaded!  I'm just being totally anxious about the possibility.  Usually I have all this creative energy and want to do a bunch of crafts and decorating for the holidays.  But this year I'm just not feeling it. I started working on one craft and went quickly into "meh" mode, coupled with, "This is too much! What was I thinking?!"  I knew that I would feel better if I would just start shopping.  It's like as soon as you put in that first order with Amazon you know a chunk of gifts are done!  Total retail therapy.  Just like the marketers want.  And it worked for a little while; I started shopping and I felt very much relieved.  But then I went to an IRL store to find something, and I couldn't find it, even though the name of that something was in the title of the store (I mean, seriously, WTF?), and I started to feel annoyed and grumpy and vaguely anxious again!

So I can only assume that the people in charge of the holidays (marketers, elves, kwanzaa-bots, whatevs) are not doing a very good job of engaging me.  Get on that, people.

I'm still looking forward to Christmas. I enjoy the festivities. But while I pretty much know what I'm going to get everyone else, I can't muster up the energy to think of anything for myself. I'm sure this is really annoying to Keen. So far all I've asked for is a hoodie that Keen owns, in a smaller size, and tights.  That's it.  Socks would also be acceptable.  A warm glow, christmas cheer, unlimited time, and a good book would be cool, too.

I think the marketers pretty much hate me now.


Baby talk and boobies

Chance is going through a baby talk phase right now that is driving me absolutely bonkers.  I've never been a fan of baby talk in general.  I don't think it's endearing.  You know those young women who do it because they think it makes them look cute?  I think those women are tools.  (I mean, if you're gonna do that, do it in private! You know what I'm talking about.)  Besides the fact that it grates my nerves it also makes Chance really hard to understand.  I mean, he is still at the age where he mixes up his 'r's and 'w's and then he throws baby talk into the mix.  I think he picked it up from playing house with the girls at school.  Someone always has to be the baby, see.  Either that or there's a girl he likes who is doing it and she probably looks adorable when she does it (although I bet she's driving her parents nuts, too) and he thought, "Aww, she's SO cute!  I think I like her even more and I should do stuff for her and then maybe she'll be my girlfriend. And... huh, I wonder if I can get in on that action?!"  Then he tries the baby talk to see if HE can get stuff out of it.  See, there are problems when you have a boy who already likes girls from an early age.  They pick up stuff!  Stuff I am not prepared to deal with just yet.  Like when he wanted to tell me a secret and the secret turned out to be that he "really likes boobs."

I have a headache.


College, it's where the fun's at

I don't know about you but I found the following exchange adorable...

 

Chance (1st Grader): You know when we're older?  We could find the same college to live at!

Harrison (3rd Grader):  Yeah!

Chance:  And then at college we could have Pokemon battles all the time!

Harrison:  Yeah! That would be awesome!

 

So I love that the schools start college awareness so early, but I think the kids are still a little fuzzy on the concept. 


It can eat your brain

I've been watching Walking Dead and I think it's sunk into my brain a little too much. I can't seem to get zombie apocalypses - or any apocalypses - out of my mind. There's kids on this show, see, and one got hurt and one went missing (exclamation point exclamation point exclamation point) so naturally I start thinking about what happens if the whole world goes to hell in a handbasket and I have to protect Chance while struggling for survival.  Seriously, when I watch this show I feel like I'm getting punched in the heart, multiple times. And then I think about it. At night. And freak myself out. *Also, I'm starting to think it would be a good idea to learn how to shoot a crossbow.

So we had some good solid family time last week. Went out of town over night, did some day trips.  Keen took the week off and since it was a short school week we decided to pull Chance out of school.  (Yes, we are naughty.)  Even though Chance hates it, it's nice to go dark every once in a while. Get away from TV shows and video games.  Sunlight is awesome.  Of course, we have our phones but I think too much of any technology creates a weird sort of tunnel vision. Like my obvious yet realistic obsession with zombies.  It's easy to get sucked in.  I'm not trying to kid myself, I spend a good amount of time online, playing video games, watching TV, but I try to step out of it when I can.  (Confession: most of the time I have no idea what's "trending".  Gasp! Social networking faker!)

Besides, if there ever is an apocalypse I'm thinking power is going to be the first to go. 

             - the weirdgirl

*Another reason to go dark?  TV gives me ideas. Like thinking it would be worthwhile to take a poledancing class. I doubt lap dances have ever been useful for killing zombies.


Blame the Internet! A meme

Just so you know, I blame the Internet for everything.  Because really it is the source of SO MUCH!  For example,

I blame the Internet...

For the time suck games on Facebook

For making me feel vaguely concerned about such things as Klout and "Like" pages

For writing blog posts instead of working on my novel

For being deeply concerned that no one sets zombies on fire!  Really, it's a solution!

For giving me a false sense of social interaction

For relying on spellcheck

For considering online shopping while drunk (shoes!)

For feeling guilty

For gross videos that I CAN'T STOP WATCHING!

For not being able to keep track of my passwords by myself

For providing a real-time framework for existentialism

 

The meme: Just copy or add to this list, or create your own list of things you blame the Internet for, then pass it on! If you tag ten friends then you will have good luck with Twitter all day!