Roomba, Baby!
Plugging Away

Fuck, the Dilemna

Funny thing has been weighing on my mind lately.  It’s the issue of swearing.  OK, wait, that’s not the funny part.  The funny part is that I have been struggling with the dilemna of swearing in my posts and had been considering writing about it and then good ol’ Fuzzbox happened to mention it, too.  See, back in the day when I started this blog I was all excited to have a medium where I could swear like a fucking son of a bitch.  Because it really is my natural inclination to swear more than not.  I may be one of those chicks who goes to afternoon tea, and always has a purse, and have been told I have an “innocent” face (whatever that fucking means) but I can extensively and enthusiastically curse.  One of my girlfriends once called me her “potty-mouth tea friend”.  However, through the years of academic interviews, dinners with in-laws, and professional employment, not to mention the fact that many of my friends started having kids before I did, I had learned to curb the naughty mouth until it almost didn’t exist anymore.  I figure it’s just something you don’t want to do around the kids.  My own included.

(Now don’t get me wrong.  I’m not so crass as to be someone who uses shit, fuck, or damn every other word, just for the sake of saying shit, fuck, or damn.  But I do think there is a proper time for everything and that includes cuss words.  Such as… when a strong emphasis is needed or just for the pure enjoyment of swearing.  Life is short, damnit.)

So when I started this blog I thought, “Cool shit, sailor, you get to whip open the fucking pants and let them fly!!”  I thought this is the place I can swear again.  The kid doesn’t have to hear it, the in-laws don’t have to hear it, no one I work with has to hear it (except for the Sales department – I think it’s required in there), I am good to GO!  But another funny thing happened.  Once I started typing swear words, they started creeping back into my everyday speech. 

See it seems my brain only has two modes, swear like a sailor or good mommy, and these two modes affect all functions (writing, talking, conversing with strangers).  I couldn’t swear in one place without swearing in another.  If you notice I kind of go back and forth on this blog.  Some days I swear a lot, then comes a dry spell, and then the cycle renews.   I still WANT to curse, I just don’t want to do it around my son.  Once I start catching myself doing it around my son, i.e. “Man, that Dora is a fucking tool,” then I cut out writing the curse words, too. 

Poor Fuzzbox was under the impression that I don’t swear at all.  So sadly untrue.  And especially if I get worked up I have a hard time holding back.  But I rarely swear on other people’s blog’s comments.  ‘Cause even though you are all more than welcome to swear in my comments if you’d like (go ahead, I DON’T mind), I just think it’s kind of rude to do it in other people’s houses.  Ya know?           - the weirdgirl

P.S. One of my favorite curse-able expressions (not that I ever got to work it into conversation):  If the streets were lined with dicks your mother would be walking on her ass.

Comments

Jon

I just laughed out loud at the last line of the post. I may have to wipe of some spit that flew out as well....haha.

- Jon
- Daddy Detective
- www.daddydetective.com

knq

heh. I am the same way. she goes to bed and I'm cursing it up.

I try to not to sware on other people's blog comments either - unless they've done it on mine.

:)

KC

I curse when I'm angry. I also cry when I'm angry. I'm glad I don't get angry too often!

Mary

I don't swear on my blog. But that's because I have to stay in persona, fer gosh sakes. Would YOU leave YOUR baby with a potty-mouth?

I assumed people would guess it was a persona, but no, they think that person is really ME. Okay, so I'm not a total potty-mouth, not really, but I'm not the madonna...

So, over on some other blog in a lively conversation, I said "fucking" something-or-other, and conversation Ground. To. A. Halt.

"Holy Shit," says someone. "Excuse me while I recover from the shock of Mary P just dropping the F-bomb."

Bwah-ha. Still waters run deep, don'cha know.

the weirdgirl

Mary - I know what you mean! I was writing the Bad Mommy Chronicles as satire early in the beginning of this blog. I thought it was really obvious that those were a persona and satirical but lots of people thought I was serious! I felt bad so I stopped writing them. Unfortunately, the rest of these entries are pretty much me.

(And I knew you were exagerating your caregiver persona; it's witty and tongue-in-cheek, you're obviously having a lot of fun with it. And I have fun reading it! Plus your comments on other sites give us glimpses past the Mary Poppins face.)

Oh, btw, I'll be adding your latest submission to the Things They Didn't Tell Us list soon!

jw

WG, I went back through your comments on my blog and found you did not swear but came close once when you mentioned that schools should teach latin.

I get a kick our Granny. She will sometimes add "Did that offend JW?" Don't worry, I won't be offended (unless you are describing me with those words!).

the weirdgirl

JW - I should amend my statement... I TRY not to swear on other people's sites. Occasionally I slip up and do it anyway!

(However, if the said owner of the site is swearing up and down I admit I don't worry about it as much.)

Chag

I try not to swear on my own site despite the fact I curse like a sailor in real life. I try not to curse around the kids (something slips out every now and then), so my site is practice.

And I don't believe I've ever cursed in someone's comments.

ktjrdn

I thought this was an apropriate place to say What the Hell? 153 of your old posts popped up as unread today in my reader. This happened to me esterday for someone else's site too. I wonder if it's google or typepad that's fucking up. :)

Scott M.

I'm against swearing in front of children, and have to watch that myself. But swearing--well I'll just let this line from an Irish folk song speak for me: "Some say that swearin's a sin, but where is the man that can tell? For swearin' has been in disordered, since the Divil was told 'Go to Hell!'" What annoys me is a comment I've heard for many years--that people who swear alot have a limited vocabulary. This is bullshit! I have an extensive vocabulary, and I swear like hell! People who swear alot don't do so because they have a limited vocabulary, but because they have alot of stress in their lives (this is why teenagers swear so much). I have a very stressful life, living with mental illness. So I swear probably much more than the average person, though mostly when I'm alone. Then there are the euphemisms--what the self-righteous people use. They think they're not swearing, but they are. "Doggone it!", "Dadgone it!", and "Confound it!" all mean "Goddamnit!" "Darn!" = "Damn!", "Good gosh!" = "Good God!"--and the list goes on.
There's no difference between a euphemism and the word it replaces, so people who always use euphemisms are hypocrites. Finally, there are alot of words used against others, that--though not swear words--are far worse: "Get out of here!", "Shut up!", "You're a loser!", "You're good for nothing!", "The Devil's got a hold of you!", "You're crazy!", "I hate you", "You're an idiot!" The unkind words we say to others--as well as ourselves--are far more damaging than the "swear" words of our society.

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